I’m coming out… (This wasn’t my coming out but it prompted me to come out sooner)

 

I wrote a status on Facebook. It was written out of frustration of people always offering unrealistic solutions to real life problems. To protect privacy (though this was written on a public forum)I will omit all the names except mine. I will indicate the christians  as “Saved”, and my  frineds “Not Saved”. The only name you will see is mine, Bernadette. You may see people refer to me as: Bernie, Bern, B…. all those people are referring to me.

I do not need to provide any further commentary as the christians proved my point!

Bernadette:  Tired of people offering c god and prayer as solutions to real life problems…

Saved 1:???

Not Saved 1:  I agree it’s annoying when people impose their belief systems on another person, assuming theirs is the only path to inner peace.

Saved 2:  Well how could you be tired of the ONE who sustains us and provides solutions to real life problems….

Saved 1: Well to me…God and prayer are the solutions to MY problems…if u don’t believe that then that’s fine…I wouldn’t Impose my beliefs onto you but I wouldn’t knock your beliefs either! To each his own.

Saved 2: Truth, at the moment and time of the problem, we don’t want to hear or accept God and that prayer changes things, because we want it fixed right yesterday, however He still works all things together for our good. It’s not imposing, it’s called sharing and standing on what the Bible says and we agree with… ones’ choice not to accept and believe… however, this statement coming from one who states that they are a BELIEVER attracts my immediate attention….

Not Saved 1: uhm. But I do not think this is what Bernadette wants.

Saved 2:  Bernie can speak for herself and based on her belief and past comments I believe this was typed out of frustration, which happens in this race, but doesn’t change what we Believe and know works…. and if it is so, then her first works are calling her back home…..

Not Saved 2: The lord can’t fix everything sometimes you have to take your on action!!!

Bernadette:  Solutions to real life problems requires real life actions like hard work. I give myself credit for all the things I worked so hard to accomplish. My status would suggest that I sit back, do nothing and wait on my imaginary friend to come to my rescue… But this is just ME.

Bernadette:  Oh no… I’m not frustrated…. I have lived life and it took 32 years to realize how brainwashed I was.

Saved 1:  Its thru the Grace of God That u are able to do what u do mama…he gives u the strength to get yourself in action and accomplish everything that u do! But again that’s what I believe and u have the right to feel how u feel…

Saved 1:  Noone is saying Only God can fix everything…that would be ignorant…of course u have to get up and do for yourself but TO ME you wouldn’t be able to GET up every day and Conquer the struggles and Obstacles if God doesn’t allow u to get up every morning!!

Saved 2:  If you think, feel & believe that you have been brainwashed and if you think, feel & believe that you did everything by yourself, OK….. And with that I exit… simple because I refuse to engage in foolery…. Proverbs 26.4-5 speaks for itself and me…. Be well!

Bernadette:  Saved 2… I have lived on that side… And no, I’m not tryna impose on anyone… Just my own personal opinion.

Saved 1:  I can respect that…

Not Saved 3:  smh two hands working are more efficient than a thousand clasped in prayer. To the person who basically called Bernie a fool via bible verse I’m tired of condencescing fundies like yourself who mask insults within bible verses 

Saved 3:  Prayer changes things, this I know is true. Everyone is entitled to their own feelings and opinions. Bernadette believe what you wish but I AM PRAYING FOR YOU!

Bernadette:  Saved 3… Love ya much… I really don’t want prayer. Dont really need it… Don’t serve a purpose for me. It don’t change things for me… Never have, never will.

Not Saved 4:  Brainwash? But yes, we all were and still are. “Until the lion tells his side of the story, the tale of the hunt will always glorify the hunter “God is our father. And prayers are important to honor him and our ancestors. Some humans took religion and used and still use it as a mass population control. For all those making comments without knowing the truth, here are a few Elders that you should learn from: Dr.Ida B Wells, Dr Finch, Dr Henry Clark, Dr Ben, and Dr Frances Cress Welsing. And you should probably check this movie: Hidden Colors (by Tariq Nasheed) know your history. Educate yourself. Wake Up! One Love!

 Not saved 3:  I’m praying for you ” you sound crazy with all this talk but I’m gonna make you think I care with a blanket statement”

Not saved 4: Don’t let hate blind you. Prayers are important. It’s just that maybe not to a white Jesus. Not to the lies they told you. But there is a God. And he will always be there for you.Chechttp://www.historywiz.com/ife.htmk this link

Not Saved 3: does the god you pray to ever answer you as if you can hear them right beside you? How do you pray to a person you never met? If you are hearing voices…I think y’all need to get mentally evaluated

Saved 3: Bernadette you are obviously going through something and I do respect your feelings and opinions but because I do have love for you my sister, I am going to pray for you anyway. As far as I am concerned you are already blessed. Remember life’s tests are the reasons why we have testimonies. I believe we live to share our testimonies because of God’s grace and mercy. I am looking forward to hearing your testimony in the near future.

Bernadette:  Not saved 4, we are all gods… that’s our intuition. That’s what sustains us and keeps us going… or at least kept me going. I have lived the “god life” for 30 something years. have been abused in the worse way cause of it and almost committed suicide. This ain’t something that im talking blindly about. I have lived life and I have seen some things… is just now that I actually took some time to think about things. And when I begin to use reason and logic, my world changed. Children, in their innocent state question everything. As time goes on, you’re taught not to question anything… I’m not trying to change nobody opinion on anything and I’m not trying to disrespect anybody… Is my process :-)

Bernadette:  Thank you Not Saved 4… Sun worship is what I believe they called it.

Not Saved 3 do any of these people offering prayer have anything else to offer Bernie I wonder

Not saved 4: I know B. And U are doing amazingly great in the process you are.I know you will continue growing and growing. We are God’s children. We are brothers and sisters. And you are right we fail to treat each other’s as such. With love and respect. This society is full with egos and selfishness. But all I’m saying is don’t drop all in the same bag because 80% is doing the wrong things. Because there are lots of brothers and sisters trying to do the right things. Don’t let those that want the wrong things, because of their twist of religion and faith, take your faith away. God lives in you, because you are his daughter. And you are unique. And know that whatever you need to go through go through it. I’ll respect that cause we all go through our journeys. But as a friend I just want you to know that I love you and I will pray for you even if you don’t want it. But I will also do whatever I can to help you out .Prayers should always come along with actions .Much Love! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orisha      

Saved 4:  Bernie, I love you and am praying for you. To the not saved 3 chick, my Aunt Saved 2 was and is right in EVERYTHING she said. If you didn’t like it then keep it to yourself after all she was talking to Bernie not you. And she was encouraging Bernie, not attacking her. You don’t want to believe in the Lord, fine, but know this, you wouldn’t be alive today to say such things if the Lord hadn’t shown you mercy by waking you up this morning. You can type, yea He gave you the ability for that. You get up and go to work and make that money and take care of things/ppl, the Lord allowed you to be able to function to do all of these things and to have the knowledge to do so. So Renee go think on that and Bernie, again I love you and am praying for you because I refuse to believe you feel you’ve been brainwashed               

Not Saved 3:  she needs REAL friends who can offer more than prayers and false comfort so gtfohwtbs

Not saved 3: So marinate on that your “prayers” are useless if they are never heard

Saved 4: How abt you marinate on this, while the Lord is allowing you the breath of life to type such foolishness, he hears EVERYTHING you are saying, thinking, and he hears prayers. Just because He doesn’t answer them in the way you think he should, or when you think he should doesn’t mean he isn’t at work on your request. Some things he knows isn’t right for you even though you don’t know it so he keeps some things to protect you. So stop discouraging Bernie with your anti-prayer/christian mess. And keep ya cussing to yaself. A grown woman knows how to use her words to get her point across. There are enough words in the dictionary. Use them!

                 

Unsure: hmmmmm I will say too a degree certain things are common sense and it doesn’t make sense too throw every lil thing god that you already to do or too handle but life becomes easier when we put it in god hands….. sum times in life we feel like we deal with life issues not god so why shud I go to him when I have to put so much effort into life and choices and hard work…….. Believe it or not that’s the exact reason why we need god because of our choices

Unsure: but I do agree with mi Bernie to a degree on certain occasions

Bernadette:  Wow! I wouldn’t think that my own personal opinion and belief system would cause so much hostility. It ain’t necessary. I stand on my opinion and that’s that. It just proves my point how relentless Pete can be. I have not said one bad or foul thing about anyone in the status itself or my comments. Why am I being attacked for expressing my personal opinion??? I really dint need an answer but my point was made a by itself.         

Not saved 3: Smh like I gatdam said. If you can’t or don’t care to help Bernie keep your ineffective prayers to yourself u jesus loving reglitards don’t scare me. I’m out.

Saved 5: God is able to exceedingly and abundantly above all we could ask or think. He’s like a parent that gives you warnings through signs and gut feelings, not to do or indulge in most worldly pleasures. But we do anyhow and we get beat up we want him to work it out, and guess what? He always does! He loves you

Saved: 5 He will make your name calling enemies your footstool!

Saved 5:  Bernie I’d love to talk to ya I would love to hear more about your opinion. Inbox me your number.

Not Saved 1: instead of all this talk about prayers why don’t you go to her house with groceries she may need, or offer to babysit her sons so she can get a much needed break? Or why not stop by with some clothing her sons may be able to use?

                 

Not Saved 1: ‎Bernadette, just delete the comments you don’t agree with! That’s what I do. Post your religion on your OWN damn page!

Not Saved 5: Bernadette welcome to Buddhism : ) it’s all about what YOU do for YOURSELF. (Not praying to “anyone”, my Buddhism does NOT pray to a “buddha”, rather teaches you to create your own happiness) AND it’s a shame everyone assumes if u say something “non” God related that makes u a “bad person”. Hello!—— there are MANY religions. MINE IS good as yours. And the way people have been offering up “suggestions” have no longer worked for you. Been there myself!!!! Please let talk privately about some more……..

Bernadette:  ‎not saved 1, I didn’t write this status as a cry for help. I’m just tired of hearing that as solutions to problems. When you present a problem or situation, that’s the first thing that most people say. I didn’t write this out of frustration either. This is how I think…. I have been hearing this all my life and I never really seen it solves many issues.

Not  Saved 1:  I’ve been there too. Honestly, these people would do a lot better if they ACTED instead of just typing!    

Not Saved 1:  I know, but still. They are talking to you as if you are desperate. If they feel that you need that much help, then ACT!

 Saved 5: Pls inbox me your number

Bernadette: ‎not saved, this honestly does not have anything to do with another status I wrote. I guess in a way, it’s me “coming out” with my new belief.

Bernadette: … I am at work so I can’t speak now

Not saved 3: I’m saying all this prayer talk is bullshit and pacifier I agree with what not saved 1 said

"Rather fail with honor than succeed by fraud." Sophcles

"Never fear shadows. They simply mean there’s a light shining somewhere nearby." Ruth Renke

"Some people go through but it don’t humble their spirit and therefore critique others." Pastor Mike

"You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams"

"When you pretend the devil don’t exist or you ignore him… you give him confidence. Remember who you are and whose you are!"

"Don’t allow the negative responses of others to determine your value. Who are they to judge you anyway. People are not the experts of your worth

"If a man is always insisted on being serious and never allowed himself of fun and relaxation, he would go mad or become unstable without knowing it" Herodotus

"Never judge a man by the size of his dick, but rather by the strength of his spine that connects his brain to his ass." http://www.heartless-bitches.com/heartless/collected_quotes.shtml

"Most people who judge a book by it’s cover have difficulty reading!!" Ithaca Sunkissed Butts

"It is better to have an ENEMY who honestly says they hate you.. Than to have a FRIEND who’s putting you down SECRETLY.." Meera Teckwani

"Always being in a relationship weakens your independence…learn to do for self before you can try to do for others…" Malika Hope

As someone who was previously obese, from my studies, from interactions with the many sistas over the years, and thru observations, i can say the following statement with near certainly: Obesity is not merely a physical problem, it is rooted in psychosocial/emotional dynamics. For many it's not simply exchanging a bigMac for a bowl of fruits, it runs on so many levels, tis is why it is not a beast that has been conquered overall. Yes there are individuals(self included) who moved from obesed to healthy or some semblance of it, but walk in any hood/community of color(black/hispanic) & hanging bellies is the norm. So the psychosocial aspect which is literally & figuratively the 1000 pd elephant in our communities room has to be tackled before any REAL overall success with obesity. Until such time have 2 green smoothies a day & meditate on some solutions. Wellness Walk! One luv!

 

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Jendayi Nanyamka

"You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else." Albert Einstein

"Hate less, live longer." Terri Guillemets

"All the bad stuff you’ve went through, the people who’ve disappointed you and the things that didn’t go your way.. Suddenly you feel grateful for them, because those are the things that got you here. Those are the things that made you who you are. Those are the things that helped you learn who you can trust, who you can depend on and those are the things that showed you what it’s like to struggle, but in the end turn out STRONGER."

11 BENEFITS OF WATER:

1. Lose weight: Drinking water helps you lose weight because it flushes down the by-products of fat breakdown. Drinking water reduces hunger, it’s an effective appetite suppressant so you’ll eat less. Plus, water has zero calories.
2. Natural Remedy for Headache: Helps to relieve headache and back pains due to dehydration. Although there are many other reasons that contribute to headache, dehydration is the common one.
3. Look Younger with Healthier Skin: You’ll look younger when your skin is properly hydrated. Water helps to replenish skin tissues, moisturizes skin and increases skin elasticity.
4. Better Productivity at Work: Your brain is mostly made up of water, thus drinking water helps you think better, be more alert and concentrate more.
5. Better Exercise: Drinking water regulates your body temperature. You’ll feel more energetic when doing exercises and water helps to fuel your muscles.
6. Helps in Digestion and Constipation: Drinking water raises your metabolism because it helps in digestion. Fiber and water go hand in hand so that you can have your daily bowel movement.
7. Less Cramps and Sprains: Proper hydration helps keep your joints and muscles lubricated, so you’ll less likely get cramps and sprains.
8. Less Likely to Get Sick and Feel Healthy: Drinking plenty of water helps fight against flu and other ailments like kidney stones, heart attack, arthritis, etc. Water added with lemon is used for ailments like respiratory disease, intestinal problems, rheumatism and arthritis etc. In other words, one of the benefits of drinking water can improve our immune system.
9. Relieves Fatigue: Water is used by the body to help flush out toxins and waste products from the body. If your body lacks water, your heart, for instance, needs to work harder to pump out the oxygenated blood to all cells. The rest of the vital organs have to work harder as well. Your organs will be exhausted and so will you.
10. Good Mood: Your body feels good and you will too.
11. Reduce the Risk of Cancer: Some studies show that drinking a healthy amount of water may reduce the risks of bladder cancer and colon cancer. Water dilutes the concentration of cancer-causing agents in the urine and shortens the time in which they are in contact with bladder lining.

**DRINK COLD WATER German researchers found that drinking 6 cups of cold water a day (that’s 48 ounces) can raise resting metabolism by about 50 calories daily—enough to shed 5 pounds in a year. The increase may come from the work it takes to heat the water to body temperature. Though the extra calories you burn drinking a single glass doesn’t amount to much, making it a habit can add up to pounds lost with essentially zero additional effort.

"Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game."

"The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit." Proverbs 15:4

"Get over him. He’s not even worth it. He is not worth your time or your tears. Yeah you loved him, I know that. I know you just can’t see yourself with anyone other than him, I get that. I’ve been there. But why should you spend all your time sitting at home, bawling your eyes out and wondering where he is and who he is with. Do you honestly think he is thinking about you? No. Sure it hurts, the fact that he is out there falling in and out of love with other girls. Yeah you’re going to see him with one of his new girlfriends. Prepare yourself, because straight up; it’s gonna hurt. He will hold her a little closer and squeeze her hand a little tighter just because he knows you’re watching. He knows it’s killing you; and that’s why he will do it. Don’t let him get to you because that, well that’s exactly what he wants. Don’t give him what he wants. He doesn’t even deserve it. So what if he doesn’t talk to you? Do you honestly wanna be friends with an asshole like him anyway? Thing is, I know you still do. But give it time. Because all he would do is talk about his new girlfriend and just try and make you jealous, and really. Do you want to hear that? No. So screw him and his girlfriend. He will be sorry, trust me. When he finally sees you with some other guy who’s not him. With that huge grin on your face and your boyfriend holding you close, he will realize how happy you are now. And how happy your boyfriend is because he has you; the girl of his dreams. He will realize the huge mistake he made when he let you go, when he decided to choose her over you, when he decided he just did not love you the same. Trust me, he will be sorry. So don’t go on spending your nights waiting for that one phone call you know you’ll never get. Or that IM you know he will never send you simply because he likes to ignore you. He likes to pretend he doesn’t see you online, and he does it out of spite just because he knows it’s killing you. When he walks past you in the hallways, he is gonna look past you, but you need to know he only does that because he knows somewhere inside you, it will hurt. I’m not gonna lie to you. It will hurt. It will hurt a lot. But it will hurt even more when you see her name and how much he loves her in his profile. It’s all going to hurt. Knowing you’re not the girl that’s making him smile. Knowing you’re not the first person he thinks of when he wakes up and the last before he goes to sleep. Knowing you’re not the face on his wallpaper. Knowing you won’t be spending every single moment possible with him. Knowing there’s not going to be anymore late night phone calls arguing about who loves who the most. And you know what? Today, tomorrow, next week, or maybe months from now; your phone will go off with a text message, you will instantly grab your phone hoping it’s him saying he wants to give your relationship another shot. But trust me; he’s got too much pride. Even if he wanted to get back together with you, he wouldn’t tell you. You’re soon going to realize he doesn’t care about you anymore and he won’t be the first person you think of calling when you’re upset. He won’t be the one to put that smile back on your face. Yeah it’s going to hurt; it’s going to hurt a lot. But you know what you’re going to do? You’re going to hold your head up. You’re going to show him you’re better off without him and you don’t need him in your life. You’re going to prove to him that he made the biggest mistake of his life by letting you go and that you never really needed him anyway."

Anonymous

"God didn’t promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow and sun without rain. but he did promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears and light for the way."